I'm Not a Joke
by MsNita
Summary: Chase has a whole new world opened up to him when he joins a fight with a monster and loses almost with his very life. Now, he sets out to prove that he is the best, but he might need to seek help in a way he never pictured. DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from Xiaolin Showdown or Hellsing, but one of my characters from a completely different story might show.
1. Prologue

**Okay, this idea hit me one day after watching Xiaolin Chronicles. I must say it is nothing compared to Xiaolin Showdown, but I love Chase nonetheless. However, watching him in this new rendition and comparing him to other characters that I love, I thought, he's kind of pathetic. It feels blasphemous saying that, but it's kind of hard not to think that since I'll never actually see him go up against Alucard. This story starts when Chase makes the misfortune of entering a fight with my favorite vampire.**

...

Chase breathed heavily as he hid behind a tree from the monster that was stalking him. He couldn't really call it hiding, more like leaning as he tried to keep pressure off of his wounded leg. He was fortunate that the bullet just grazed him after seeing what it did to the tree it hit, but he still had a massive gash were contact was made. His warriors wouldn't be there to save him from this monster; they were dead, all of them. He fought to keep control as the horrid visions played in his head over and over again. His warriors, his beautiful feline companions, ripped to shreds before his very eyes. Teeth ripping the head off a tiger, a hand spearing through a lion, spilling its entrails. That disgusting slurping sound as the creature's unnaturally long tongue lapped up the blood that is spilled as Chase covered his ears to block it out.

"Lookie what I found," a deep voice snarled.

Chase looked over in the direction he had been trying to run in to see the monster standing there, with a leopard's head in hand, blocking his path. He stared at the crooked grin and strange, circular, red glasses. It was hard to believe that the creature had just slaughtered a bunch of predatory cats just moments earlier as there wasn't a drop of blood on him. Chase cried out in indignation as the monster dropped the leopard's head before crushing it as he marched over to the Heylin warrior. Chase tried to run, but the gloved hand grabbed his shoulder and slammed him into the very tree he was hiding behind. A gasp escaped Chase's lips at the force in which he was thrust into the tree as he heard bark cracking as well as a few of his bones. Blood flew from his mouth before turning into a rivulet at the corner of his mouth as he glared at the inhumane creature before him.

Chase grunted as the monster squeezed his face in a firm grip, bruising his jawline, "You're almost too pretty to be a warrior, much less a man." Chase spat bloody spittle in his face at the further indignation he was suffering. Chase was repulsed as that disgusting snake of a tongue slithered out to lick up the bloody spittle. "Mmm, you might taste even better."

Chase's eyes went wide as the monster lowered his head letting a cool breath caress Chase's neck. Chase cried out as fangs pierced his skin. Slowly, he could feel his blood leave his body, even the gash on his leg managed to stop bleeding at the lack of blood flow. His life flashed before his very eyes as the creature continued to drain him. For the first time in his life, Chase was afraid, not of dying, but whether or not anyone would miss him. Would Omi notice that he is no longer there at the battles for shen gong wu? Would the fiery Kimiko even bring it to anyone's attention that he had been missing? Would Raimundo make one of his smart aleck remarks about him to ignite some curiosity? Would Clay, in his homebody way, say that they need to check on him? And Jack, what would he do? He was so delicate, despite how tough he tried to show people he was. Would any of them find out, or would his body be left to rot and his soul to wander? His vision became hazy as something pulled him from his thoughts. He realized that he was laid out in the roots of the tree as the monster kneeled next to him.

"I am not going to kill you," he stated. "My Master ordered me to kill a monster, while physically, you fit the bill, a monster, you are not. So, what does that make you? A man? A dog? Heh, a woman?" Chase was too weak to spit at him again as he glared the hell beast before he moved to speak into his ear. "My Master might punish me for letting you live, but you best take this and make use of it. I never spare anyone when I am ordered to kill."

With that, the monster stood and walked away to disappear in the shadows. Chase thought that this would be how he would die, left to linger alone, not even his killer to witness his last moments. It was kind of depressing as he tried to laugh sardonically. Before he passed out, he could hear someone calling out his name.

Jack? Chase thought as everything went black.

...

**Chase: What did you do?!**

**MsN: What?**

**Alucard: You think it's unlikely?**

**Chase: Well, I'm sure you don't!**

**Alucard: What is unlikely is my letting you live.**

**MsN: Snape, you're being quiet. Help me here.**

**Snape: Promise me that you're not going to make your next story with me some raunchy festival.**

**MsN: Oh come on!**


	2. Touching in the Hospital

**Alrighty then, we are moving along with Chase's story. Just to warn my readers, this is going to be a AU story of Hellsing. I hope that this story will get better reception than my story with Barodius. Now, I am going to say this once, if you have a problem with my story, instead of leaving a "this story sucks" or "this is the worst story I have ever read," how about acting like a grown up and tell me how I can improve it while you are reading it. Yeah, I said that. I don't deal with trolls, and don't tolerate them either. Now, let us get on with the story.**

**I do not own any of the copyrights to the characters of Xiaolin Showdown or Hellsing.**

**...**

The Xiaolin warriors rushed into the hospital as soon as they heard that Chase was admitted to the hospital and was in critical condition. Clay asked to be told where Chase was being held, but when the nurse said that only family members may be permitted to see the victim, they were at a loss. It was then that Kimiko hacked the system to find out as they raced down the hallway to the ICU. They stopped when they saw Jack through a window. When he turned to look at them, they tried to keep from wincing. Jack was wringing his hands as he glanced at them before returning his attention to Chase anxiously. It was when they looked at Chase that they gasped. It was hard to tell it was even him; he wore a hospital's gown, instead of his usual armor, he had tubes coming out of him, and he even had a breathing mask on.  
Jack listened as the doctors argued over how Chase cold even be alive as a woman mentioned that he had lost more blood than was humanly possible. They had allowed Jack in because they had gotten Chase to stabilize. Jack wondered how Chase would handle some complete stranger's blood flowing through his veins. He could see bruises forming on Chase's face in the shape of a hand. Chase's entire thigh was wrapped up in gauze. The doctors had said that there were cracked ribs as well as a collapsed lung. They even said that because the blunt force trauma to his back, Chase might be temporarily paralyzed as they were still trying to reduce the swelling.  
He couldn't tell what had happened to his hero. He was going to see him and tell him one of his schemes when he came upon a massacre. When he recognized what was left of Chase's warriors, he followed the blood trail he found leading away from it to find Chase sprawled at the foot of a tree. He was so happy he had made a medbot after so many injuries. Now, he was standing at the foot of Chase's bed as the Xiaolin losers started to file in to talk to him about what happened. Typical, it was cheese-ball that opened his big mouth first.  
"How could this have happened?" he asked, "Are we sure that Chase doesn't have a weakling, twin brother?"  
"He's the real deal, cue ball," Jack yelled.  
"What happened?" Kimiko replied.  
"I don't know, I don't know," Jack answered, "I was going to tell him about another one of my plans when I walked onto the intestines of one of his cats, to see that they were ripped apart like they were rag dolls! I then see a blood trail and expecting the worse, I run to the source and find him sprawled out like a used up, broken doll at the foot of a tree!"  
"Calm down, partner," Clay whispered, "they got him stabilized, he'll be back in his feet in no time."  
"You think?" Jack asked genuinely.  
"Yeah, man," Raimundo interrupted, "ain't nothing that can keep Lizard-breath down." Jack smiled weakly, despite the insult made about his hero.  
Chase could tell they were all there, the Xiaolin monks and Jack. He knew he was in a hospital; he could feel the tubes entering his body, hear the machine monitoring his vitals, and he could smell the breathing mask on his face. He opened his eyes slightly as he gazed at the youths talking amongst each before looking around him. He gazed at the donated blood with distaste, but he wasn't about to rip out the source of what he could only assume was keeping him alive. When his gaze shifted to the window, absolute shock seized his entire body. Standing there was the monster that put him there, and a woman he had never seen before. He didn't know what happened next as everything became a blur as he focused on the monster that almost killed him.  
The Xiaolin monks didn't know what happened to cause the change as they were getting ready to leave, but the machine monitoring Chase started blaring as his pulse rate accelerated. Jack was screaming in horror as tears fell down his face when the doctors all rushed in pushing everyone out besides Jack. They watched through the window as Chase started coughing up blood as the doctors struggled to get him stabilized again.  
Through the flurry of doctors yelling, Chase could hear the monster speak with his master. Chase struggled to listen to them as for a brief moment he saw one of the doctors take off the breathing mask that was now coated in blood.  
"Explain to me, why didn't you kill him?" She asked, "You've never disobeyed an order so blatantly."  
"Because my master," he replied silkily, "you sent me to kill a monster. While he might fit the bill, I can't really call him a monster."  
"How is that?"  
"Because unlike me or any other monster I have met, he can choose to take back his humanity. He just refuses to."  
"Very well," she stated, "but you better be right on this. If he causes any trouble…"  
"Those children they just shoved out usually keep him in line," he said amusingly.  
As they left, Chase thought depressingly, I am nothing more than a joke to them.

The Xiaolin monks were coming to check on Chase after Kimiko had found a post from Jack stating that he was stable again and awake. When they reached the room Chase was in, they received a truly sad sight. Inside Jack was actually force-feeding Chase what they knew to be the Loa Mang Long soup, but what was surprising was the fact that Chase was trying to fight him. Chase would try to push Jack's hand away only to leave scratch marks that would bleed. Raimundo winced along with Jack as Jack tried to bare through the pain as he tried to do what he believed was saving his idol. What they couldn't understand was why Chase was refusing to take the soup, the very soup that he tried to make Dojo out of.  
Chase gasped out after Jack had managed to force the soup down him. He had to admit that he was impressed that despite the damage Chase had done to his hand, Jack had ignored it and didn't even make a sound as he completed his goal. It also angered Chase that he was so weak that Jack could force him to do something he refused to do. He didn't want the soup anymore, if it couldn't help him against that monster than what good was it?  
"There you go Chase," Jack whispered desperately, "Now, you'll heal in no time."  
"What if I don't want to heal?" Chase replied coarsely.  
"Don't say that!" Jack snapped, "Once you're better than you can go beat the sense into whoever put you in here!"  
"You don't really believe that, do you Jack?" Chase asked. "If he put me in here once, what makes you think he won't kill me the next time?"  
Jack was trying to fight back the tears at the thought of losing his hero, Chase could see that clearly. He couldn't recall being admired by someone so fully. He was holding in all the turmoil he was feeling because he knew that the monks were just standing outside the window. He couldn't let them see him break, he wouldn't let them see. He could tell Jack had been crying quite a bit because his eyes were extremely bloodshot. Chase gently took his hand and clasped it in an attempt to apologize for brutalizing his fingers so. Knowing that they were reading too much into it, he didn't stop the monks when Clay suggested that they give them some privacy. Chase couldn't help but smile at Omi's innocence as he didn't understand Clay's meaning. When they were gone though, it really hit him; the depression, the fear, the shame, all of it. For the first time since he couldn't even remember when, Chase broke down. He knew it scared Jack senseless to see his very idol weep before him, but Chase would have been lying if he said the he knew Jack would gently embrace him and let him cry into shoulder. Chase was so confused by this affection, but it had been so long since he had allowed any affection to be shown to him. He didn't know how long he had wept or when he had fallen asleep, but he awoke briefly to find himself with Jack's arms wrapped around him. He sighed as he fell back to sleep, he was too tired to care about the extended amount of contact he was permitting Jack, and at the moment the warm body was an added comfort that he wasn't about to chase off, even if it was Jack.  
It wasn't long before Chase was even taken off of the heart monitor as he was becoming more like himself. The doctors were amazed by how fast he was healing. Chase was sleeping peacefully with Jack sleeping next to him. For a brief moment, he felt someone watching him. He opened his eyes to see a strange man with circular glasses staring down at him with a maniacal smile. Chase was about to say something, but only a rasp would escape his throat as it burned horribly.  
The man shushed him before saying in a fairly thick German accent, "You won't be able to talk for a while, especially since I injected drain cleaner into your throat. A bit crude, but it ruins the vocal cords fairly quickly. Now, I need to find out what is so special about you that Alucard wouldn't kill you, and how you can heal from a battle with him so quickly. If you don't mind…"  
Without a moment hesitation, the man stabbed a needle into his neck as he began to draw blood from him. Chase yelped at the sudden pinch in his neck as he looked to see his blood fill the vial. He looked up in confusion as he watched the man cap off the vial. Chase turned to bite his hand when the man dared to stroke his cheek.  
"Oh, I do love it when they're feisty," he replied, ignoring Chase's look of disgust. "You're lovely, little friend will be asleep for a little while. Couldn't very well have him interrupting us, now could we? I best be going. My alpha gets upset when I dawdle."  
Alpha? Chase thought, So, he has someone who is in charge of him, too. He knew that the man must have given him something as he couldn't move a muscle in his body. When he felt a hand rubbing his thigh, he growled at the stranger. The German just laughed and said that he'd be falling asleep soon anyway before he walked out. Chase hated it, but the madman was right. He figured that he must have slipped him a sedative before Chase awoke because Chase was now fighting sleep, and failing.  
When Chase awoke next, he was by himself with a letter from Jack saying that he needed to be somewhere. Chase was left to entertain himself, which was really hard in a place that mortals couldn't even entertain themselves properly. He had committed himself to the droll monotony of the television when Wuya waltzed in. Chase's eyes went wide as she started circling him like one of his cats circled their next meal.  
"Well, well, what do we have here?" she droned, "The mighty Chase Young is stuck in a hospital bed. What happened?"  
"Getting my flu shot," Chase replied sarcastically. However, he eyed Wuya warily, knowing that she wasn't there for a friendly chat. He grasped the device Jack had left for him tightly in his hand. It was a panic button that would not only signify Jack that Chase needed help, but would also put alerts all throughout the floor he was on so that the doctors would be able to help him out faster.  
"Poor Chase Young is as weak as a newborn babe," Wuya cooed, rubbing Chase's legs.  
What is with everyone touching me? Chase growled as he eyes Wuya's hands with disgust.  
"You know, there are times I would have loved to have had you in this position," she admitted.  
"I'm sure you have," Chase retorted.  
"The things I could have done, the things I could have shown you," she whispered as she lowered her head a little too close to his abs before she shot up. "However, you scorned me." Chase eyed her nervously as she watched her pick up a pillow. "You know what they say… 'Hell hath no fury…' Well, you know the rest."  
With that, she slammed the pillow over his head. He had pushed the button before focusing his energy on clawing her wrists. He might not have been able to throw her across the room like he wanted, but if nobody could get to him in time, then he was going to take her with him by slicing her wrists open. He hadn't forgotten what he had done to Jack's hand, so doing worse to her wrists wouldn't be a problem. When the pillow was removed from his face, Chase gasped for air as Jack helped sit him up. The doctors were hauling Wuya out as she fought with them.  
"Chase, are you okay?" Jack almost yelled.  
"I'm fine," Chase breathed out as he leaned against Jack.  
"Here, let me clean you up," Jack replied, before getting up.  
Chase watched as Jack grabbed a few paper towels and wetted them before coming back and wiping the blood off of Chase's hands. After he had cleaned his hands, Jack went about worrying over him with other things. Chase fought with him on whether or not he should take a nap, the latter of which Chase was rooting for. It was when the doctor came in, however, that he lost that battle as he turned to see Jack smirking at him. He resigned himself to his fate as Jack laid him back and tried to get him comfy. Jack looked at him in surprise when he held up the panic button.  
"It worked Jack," Chase said, "One of your inventions saved my life. Be proud of that, you are coming along quite nicely."  
"Thank you," Jack muttered as Chase could see him fighting back tears.  
You are much more delicate than you want people to believe, Chase thought, You'll never be an _evil_ genius, but you might at least be working your way to being a true genius and that is good enough.

**...**

**Snape: I see that you haven't complained.**

**Alucard: She's working on a story with me in it, I am appeased. *pats MsN on the head***

**MsN: Yay!**

**Chase: Why must everyone touch me in such inappropriate manners?**

**MsN & Alucard: Because you're so pretty!**

**Chase: *facepalm* You are so amusing.**

**Snape: Which one of your character are you planning on introducing in this story?**

**MsN: She's been posted on my DA account.**

**Chase: Wait! It's a _she?! _You are not pairing me off with an OC, are you?**

**MsN: Maybe, in a yes and no sense. I don't know yet.**

**Chase: You better get to knowing!**


	3. Meeting New People

**Alright, I decided on short notice to add three OCs. Now, I'm sure that at least half of you have just rolled your eyes and thought, "Great, another ChasexOC fic." Well, if you're going to judge a book by it's cover then go ahead, it says a lot more about you than it does me. Anyway, I hope you enjoy the new chapter. Again, I do not own any of the characters of Xiaolin Showdown or Hellsing. I only own Selene, Severus, Artemis, and Apollo.  
**

**...**

Chase was sleeping lazily as Jack was off chasing Shen Gong Wu and Wuya hadn't been foolish enough to rear her ugly head. He didn't expect Jack anytime soon, especially if he got his butt handed to him like always. It was when he felt something jump onto his bed and delicately step its way to his chest that he was stirred from his sleep to at least allow his other senses to investigate. The creature laid down on his chest and Chase immediately could tell that it wasn't Bean, unless he was using the Moby Morpher, but Chase couldn't feel metal. It was when he heard someone try to quietly walk in that he was on full alert.  
"Severus," she scolded, "how many times do I have to tell you not to bother the patients that are sleeping?"  
She gently scooped up the creature causing it to cry in indignation, which caught Chase's attention as he gently grasped the feline's paw. The woman holding the black cat stopped as she looked into Chase's eyes. He released the feline as she turned to face him.  
"And what is your name?" he whispered.  
"Selene," she replied.  
"Why do you have a cat in the hospital?" he asked.  
"He's a therapy cat," she answered. "And _you're_ name?"  
"Chase," he responded.  
He could have sworn by the looks of her that she was Katnappé's older sister. However, instead of the short blonde hair, she had red wavy locks, but the way the red contrasted with her blue eyes. She stared at him incredulously as his eyes wandered down the voluptuous curves of her body, especially those wide hips. Chase brought a hand up and rubbed his face as he thought that he must be horny if he was focusing on her attractiveness. He wasn't entirely sure if that was it, but something about her, her scent, the air around her, whatever it was, seemed similar to him. If it wasn't for that mysterious factor, he would have smacked that glare off of her face.  
Taking a quick look to be sure the doctors weren't coming, she moved to the foot of his bed, immediately putting him on guard. He watched her as took the clipboard at the end of his bed and skimmed over it. It felt like a hook was tugging at one of his eyebrows as he offered her one of his own incredulous looks. When she put the clipboard back, she looked at him with a sour look on her face.  
"I knew you had the smell of a dead man on you," she said point blank.  
"What is that supposed to mean?" he all but yelled.  
"You're supposed to be dead," she answered in a matter-of-fact tone. "However, you are lying here, healing faster than the average human, might I add."  
"What business is it of yours?"  
"They didn't find the bite mark, did they?"  
"How did you...?"  
"I know many things. You're lucky that his bullet only grazed your leg. I've heard of them blowing legs clean off," she stated.  
Chase gulped at the thought of there only being a stump where his healing leg was instead, "I tend to have a lot of good fortune."  
"You don't sound so confident with this one," she mentioned.  
Suddenly, she just decided to leave as she headed to the door, her hips swaying suggestively as she went. The black tom in her hands waved its paw at him as he waved absentmindedly back. A few minutes after Selene had left, Jack came waltzing in with a Wu in hand. He sat next to Chase as he handed over the Wu to him. Chase took it and looked in it direction as his fingers moved deftly over it, but his mind was elsewhere as he thought about what she had said. As he thought about it, he remembered how the sight of the monster, that he now knew as Alucard, had sent him into an attack. How many people out there actually knew this Alucard while he had never even heard of him? Was he pulled into a completely different field that not even he was ready for?  
"Hey Chase?" Jack prodded, pulling Chase from his thoughts. "You okay?"  
"I'm fine," Chase lied, "just thinking. I see that you got the Culver Crystal."  
"Yeah, isn't it cool?" Jack said excitedly.  
"You know I have no use for Shen Gong Wu," Chase scolded lightly, "but I'm glad to see that you are so excited."  
"Really?" Jack asked in disbelief.  
I must have drastically mellowed out after that last attack, Chase thought as he nodded.  
Chase was happy that he was leaving the hospital today. Jack had brought him one of his robes that he would wear when not wearing his armor. He argued with both the doctors and Jack as they tried to make him sit in a wheelchair. He knew that he wasn't getting out fast enough, so he reluctantly consents. Grumpily, he allowed Jack to wheel him toward freedom. He growled impatiently as he waited for Jack to take care of the paperwork of checking him out. He was sure that he was an amusing sight as some of the older women would point at him and giggle. He sat there in the wheelchair with one of his legs crossed over the other at the knee, his foot bobbing, and his arms crossed in front of him. He looked up at this one old woman waddled up to him.  
"They not getting you out of here fast enough sonny?" she teased.  
Deciding to play along as it did lighten his mood, "How else am I going to watch my shows?"  
She giggled as she continued on her way. Chase was mildly surprised when Jack lightly smacked his shoulder and told him to behave. When did he get so bold? Chase thought as he looked back at him indignantly. Chase huffed as he sat back like a spoiled child not getting his way. He sighed out in exhaustion and relief when he felt his chair being pushed again as his head fell back to see Jack leaning over him.  
"Oh, quit acting like you've never waited on anything in your life," Jack growled.  
"At least the stuff I have waited on benefited me in more than just leaving a place," Chase retorted.  
Chase didn't wait a further moment when they reached the doors that he pushed out of the chair and waltzed out the door. Jack cried out before racing after him. Chase went looking for that monstrosity that Jack called transportation, coming up empty. He paused when he saw Jack leaning against a red Ferrari with a smug look on face. Chase walked over hesitantly as he eyed the vehicle suspiciously.  
"I _borrowed_ it from my dad," Jack boasted shamelessly.  
"You naughty boy," Chase groaned.  
"Oh trust me," Jack said carelessly, "he's going to rip me a new one when he finds out."  
"Well, where do you plan on taking me?" Chase asked, "This beauty won't be able to reach my home."  
"You're not going home," Jack stated, shocking Chase thoroughly, "not yet anyway. Wuya's still out there, and she probably with Bean and they probably have your place staked out, waiting to jump you. Also, since you're now without your cat warriors, they have a real advantage."  
Chase growled, "You don't think I could take them?"  
"Not while you are still healing," Jack answered, "besides I have a surprise for you at my place."  
That was enough to at least compel Chase to the car. Damn him, and his dragon curiosity. Chase secretly felt a thrill when Jack sped off to his home, always having a real lust for speed. It did not take long before they had reached Jack's home. Chase followed Jack inside to an empty room and paused as Jack went over to a box and pulled out a blanket. Chase was about to mock him until Jack forced the blanket into his arms. Chase paused when two little liger heads popped out.  
"I went back to your palace to see if any of your cats might have made it," Jack admitted, "I found these guys wandering around looking for food."  
Chase recognized the scent of two of his most faithful warriors and he knew that they recognized his scent off of their parents as they looked up at him in awe. He nuzzled them as they nuzzled him back. At least he had some piece of his beautiful warriors still.  
"I also got all of your soup," Jack stated as Chase continued to nuzzle the cubs, "couldn't let anyone get their hands on it."  
"Thank you Jack," Chase breathed.  
"Well, this can be your room until we know it's safe for you to go back," Jack continued.  
"Again, thank you," Chase sighed.  
"It's nothing," Jack commented. "Hey, can they turn into people like your other cats did?"  
"I don't know," Chase admitted, "I've never had cubs before."  
"You mean there wasn't any spanking the monkey going on?" Jack asked.  
Chase laughed at the terminology used, "Interesting choice of words Spicer, but if there was, they never let on. The males stuck to themselves, and I had only a few females. I only had two of the opposite sex that would mingle together."  
"So, if there was any of that… going on," Jack implored, a little too embarrassed to finish.  
"It would most likely have been in the form of homosexual relations, yes," Chase answered. "Don't think too much about it. It was only recently I had acquired any female warriors. So, the males had developed relationships amongst each other before then."  
Jack nodded his head before he went about showing Chase where he had placed most of his belongings. Chase looked around the room being given to him. It was fairly nice, like staying in a hotel resort. Plus, knowing Spicer, Chase might end up beg tended to like he was at one anyway, which slightly annoyed him. He honestly didn't want Spicer worrying about him all the time, he was over 1500 years after all. Walking over to the four poster bed, Chase sat down and watched as Jack was showing him the clothes he had brought from his palace, even spare armor that Chase kept. Jack then walked over to them and scratched one of the cubs behind there ear.  
"What are you going to call them?" he asked, "You never got the chance to learn their names after all."  
"They're twins," Chase replied, "how about Apollo and Artemis?"  
"It works for me," Jack stated, "how do you know they are a boy and girl?"  
"I just do," he commented.  
"Artemis and Apollo," Jack said with a great deal of thought, "welcome to the family."

**...**

**MsN: Thanks for spotting for me, Selene.**

**Selene: No problem, Author. I have to get to my story for a bit because Mordred'll worry**

**Chase: What do you have planned?**

**Alucard: What do you think she has planned? *smirks***

**MsN: Play nice, Alucard.**

**Alucard: You're the one who let me taste him**

**MsN: You were only supposed to pretend!**

**Alucard: *shrugs* I was going for authenticity**


	4. Cubs in a China Shop, Sort of

**Okay, I realize that I incorrectly named the soup in a previous chapter. So, that will be remedied later on. I have decided that Chase will be meeting a lo of OCs because it will give me a chance to make a few more to with what I please later on. However, there are a few OCs that Chase is not allowed to meet because of their delicateness and he can be just so mean when he chooses to be. This chapter shows that Chase is learning his cubs antics as they're going to be revealed to have more of a will power of their own than his own cats. I'm really going to admit it was J.K. Rowling, who inspired the idea. So, all credit goes to her. Jack is going to develop quite a backbone, which in the end might impress Chase in the long run, or further piss him off. Anywho, I do not own any of the characters of Xiaolin Showdown or Hellsing. Any characters that show up and hint to a crossover into any other verses is purely coincidental.**

**Greyback & Sabretooth: Right.**

**...**

Chase slept soundly in the bed Jack gave him to use. Jack's parents were on yet another business trip so it seemed, which meant that Jack wouldn't have to worry about explaining his new friend. Artemis and Apollo were snuggled up next to him; Artemis snuggled under the pit of his arm and Apollo stretched out in between his legs with a paw resting on his healing thigh. Chase actually wondered if it would scar as he thought about Jack having to redress it the other day. The doctors had told him that it might need to be redressed on occasion, but they felt he could tend to it himself quite easily. He hated the sight of the stitches when he had watched Jack clean it carefully as the twins sniffed at it curiously. At first, par Jack's demands surprisingly, Chase didn't sleep with the twins in the bed with him, but after the nightmare that almost had him clawing at the wound had Jack not stopped him, Jack allowed it because it gave him peace. Even though it was just a nightmare, Chase could still see the image of Alucard sticking his long, red tongue into the wound as he pulled at the stitches like pulling the seam from a doll as clear as day. Chase honestly thought it was how the monster looked up at him so casually that haunted him. Chase was roused when someone placed something on his lap, disturbing Apollo in the process. Chase sniffed the air, smelling cinnamon and maple. His mouth watered when he smelled bacon as he stirred. Opening his eyes, he saw Jack smiling at him as he held a fussy Artemis in hand.

"Hey, I brought you breakfast," he stated. "I didn't know what you liked, so I had chef-bot make pancakes with bacon and eggs, sunny-side up."

"It smells good," Chase replied as he sat up to see the meal before him, "and the looks do not disappoint either."

"Then eat up," Jack commented, "I've got to get these two fed." With that, Apollo jumped up and grabbed Jack's leg. "Yeah, yeah, I know, you're my biggest eater."

Chase watched with a smile as Jack carried off Artemis with Apollo hot on his heels. It was nice to know that Jack had taken the care of his cubs seriously when he had told him that he had been fixing them a special mixture of meat and formula. He was surprised when Jack told him how fun it actually when he gave them an occasional bottle of formula, but when he had given them one himself, he could tell why Jack enjoyed it so much. He bonded with the cubs in a way that he would have never been able to do with his warriors. Looking down at his breakfast, his stomach demanded that he partake in the meal. Slowly, he cut into the pancakes before taking an uncertain bite. Oh, well that chef-bot ever cease to amaze my taste buds? Chase thought as the flavors danced on his tongue. It was one of the few robots that Jack built that Chase actually liked because it lived up to its programming. It wasn't that Jack's robots didn't do what they were programmed to do, it's just that chef-bot did it successfully. Chase ate his breakfast happily and finished about the same time as his cubs as they came trotting up to him, licking their messy chops. Jack followed them in, stopping at the doorway as he looked at Chase, who picked up the cubs.

"Hey, I've got business I've got to tend to," Jack stated, "Since Wuya left, I've had to find other ways of getting along."

"That's fine," Chase said.

"Okay, then ground rules," Jack commented.

"Ground rules?" Chase started.

"One, take it easy, I don't want you getting hurt," Jack began, "two, don't go into my parents' room, and three, if you need anything, don't be afraid to call me."

"Three rules, is that all?" Chase muttered sarcastically.

"I believe that three's enough," Jack admitted, "You're a smart guy, I don't really have to worry about you doing anything stupid. I just set those rules as precautionary measures."

"Alright then," Chase responded, "but must I rest? I am dying of boredom here."

"I never said you had to rest," Jack teased before leaving.

Chase waited until he heard Jack shut the door behind him before he turned to his cubs. "Want to go look around, and go into his parents room?" Jack should have known that not giving that ridiculous second rule would have been more effective. Hearing his cubs mew excitedly, he grinned mischievously. "Yeah! Come on, let's go."

Chase got up and made his way out of the spare bedroom, looking this way and that. He had hacked into Jack's mainframe multiple times, and even snuck in to Jack's "evil lair" as that was the most likely place to find him. However, he had never really looked around Jack's home before. Now that Jack had told him not to enter a specific room, he was itching to defy the little upstart. Since he never actually agreed to it Jack couldn't punish him, not that he ever would. He looked around as he followed his cubs down the hallway. The first room he entered he automatically knew was Jack's room. It was a bit more elegant than he would have imagined, but it still screamed Jack. CDs and DVDs littered the bookshelves in there, and clothes were piled around a hamper. Chase looked over at the obviously slept in bed to see a poster of him hanging over the headboard.

"I certainly hope he doesn't do anything questionable while looking at that poster of me," Chase muttered as his cubs mewled. "How did he get such a good shot, though?"

After investigating Jack's room, Chase and his cubs moved on to the next room, which happened to be the master bedroom. It was so droll that Chase couldn't believe that Jack was related to these people. He suspected that the antiques were Jack's mother's because he certainly hoped that they did not belong to his father. He was looking at the king size bed that was just too perfect when he noticed out of the corner of his eye that Apollo was sniffing at an antique that was out of his reach. As soon as it tilted over and the cub ran for safety, Chase raced over and caught it before it hit the ground. He immediately regretted it when he saw mischief spark in his cubs eyes.

"Don't touch anything," he whispered fiercely. Apparently, their parents didn't have time to teach them to obey me, Chase thought in sheer panic as he saw them move to make more antiques fall. Placing the one he had caught on the bed, he raced to catch the antiques that either fell or went flying. He was frustrated that he wasn't at his usual speed, but he'd have to focus on that later. The cubs were getting quicker as he was getting loaded down with antiques because they seemed to be throwing them off of their perches faster than he could get them to the safety of the bed. "No, bad kitties," he whispered frantically, hoping that that would make them stop. However, he wouldn't be so lucky as Apollo saw one particular statuette that he wanted to get to. Artemis just laughed as she tangled up in his legs causing him to worry. Should he save the many antiques still in his hands, or save the one that was placed so high for a reason? Chase was at a loss as he cried out, leaping for the one that Apollo swiped off with his paw. He looked at it with wide eyes as it played in slow motion for him. He had miraculously caught the one as he fell to the floor only to clench at the sound of the many other antiques breaking on the floor. The cubs even knew that the crashing sound was a bad thing as they looked at him uncertainly. Placing the one he had saved in the middle of the bed, he quickly ushered his cubs out and back to the guest room where he crawled into the bed and they quickly took their spots beside him.

He had stayed there for the rest of the day, except for occasional bathroom breaks. He looked at the door out of the corner of his eye when he heard Jack open the door. He shushed the twins as he heard Jack move throughout the house. He figured he must have stopped at his room first as he heard chuckling before he glared at the twins questioningly. He turned his attention back to the door when he hear more footsteps and sat there with anticipation when they paused before moving away from him.

"CHASE!" Jack roared, much to Chase's surprise. The cubs tucked into his lap in fear as he pulled out a scroll and started pretending to read. He had wide eyes when Jack slammed open the door with a mixture of shock and rage on his face as he glared at Chase. "What the hell, man?!"

Instinctively, Chase pointed to the cubs, surprised as the childish words flew out of his mouth, "They did it." They looked up at him and hollered as his gaze shifted from their accusing faces to Jack's enraged one.

'I told you to stay out of my parents' room," Jack roared, "Now, my mother's prized antiques are broken!"

"I saved some of them."

"Some of them, yeah! But what about the ones on the floor in pieces?!"

"Again, they did it."

"They wouldn't have if you hadn't of gone in there!"

"And I wouldn't have gone in there if you hadn't told me 'not to.'"

"Do you realize how childish that reasoning is? And that's coming from ME?!"

Chase stared sourly in front of him as Jack had somehow hit the proverbial nail on the head. He was surprised when Jack sighed, and even more so, when Jack lovingly ran his fingers through his hair. Chase stared up at Jack in confusion as Jack gave Apollo a mild glare as he asked him why he had to tear apart his underwear. Chase looked at Apollo in time to see the cub roll over on his back and wave his paws at Jack, trying to be cute. Chase smiled as he rubbed Apollo's belly while Jack continued to run his fingers through his hair. Suffice to say, Chase had never known this sensation before. Well, that's not entirely true, he received a preview of the sensation when in the few moments of sentiment Dashi had given him a pat on the head, tousled his hair, or ran one swift hand through his bangs. With Jack, the movement was repetitive and loving like a mother's. Chase reluctantly removed the comforter from himself when Jack asked to see how his stitches were holding up. He watched as Jack's fingers moved deftly around the stitches before gently kissing them much like a mother kissing a child's proverbial "owie." Jack looked up at Chase with wide eyes after he realized what he had done, but when Chase didn't do anything, Jack placed a new bandage over them. He said that in a day or two, Chase could start moving around without covering them, saying that air was supposed to help in the healing process, which Chase already knew. Jack had already scheduled an appointment for when Chase would get his stitches removed, which unnerved him greatly, but then he truly had always hated hospitals.

"Jack," Chase muttered, "you're avoiding the fact that you just..."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Jack cried out really fast as he went int his usual grovelling position, "I have a little cousin, okay? It's a force of habit, second nature."

"I already know about your cousin," Chase stated, crossing his arms.

"So, you're not going to pound me into a little puddle?" Jack questioned.

"Do I look like the Xiaolin monks, who get pleasure in beating you?" Chase retorted.

"You have to admit, you can be just as violent," Jack pointed out.

"It's because you either ignore the warnings that you are annoying me, or you get in my way," Chase commented. "I don't do it because I get pleasure from it."

"You're starting to sound like you're getting ready to say 'these so-called Xiaolin monks aren't very hero-like, are they?'" Jack said as he change the pitch of his voice to match a woman's as he tossed in a few air quotes.

"Sounds like you've been talking to someone who feels this way," Chase mentioned.

"Oh yeah," Jack chirped as his whole demeanor got excited, "she's so totally awesome. She hangs out at where I work as she works on stuff. She has even given me great ideas for my robots that I haven't even considered."

"She certainly sounds exciting. Do we have a crush?"

"What?! No! Besides, she'd be more your type of chick."

"And what is my type of chick?"

"Well, she's 21, she knows how to fight, she's very well educated in certain dark matters, some of them she says that I'm too young to know about, and despite how she's sarcastic, she's a very no-nonsense kind of girl."

"And that's _my_ kind of girl?"

Jack shrugged his shoulders before saying"She might bug you at first. She doesn't care for cocky guys, the only reason she hangs with me is because she says I'm quirky and need looking after."

Chase smirked, "She's right on the need to be looked after."

"So, how is it I'm looking after you?" Jack replied with his own smirk.

Chase chuckled, "How is it, indeed."

**...**

**Chase: What OC is this? Little Gabriel?**

**MsN: *hisses* Don't touch him, or Alucard can eat you! What do you think LadySly will do to you if you lay a hand on him?**

**Chase: We've already broached this bridge.**

**Snape: Yes, multiple times might I add. He's doing it to get your goat.**

**Alucard: That's _my_ job.**

**Chase: You're not doing it good enough.**

**Alucard: Are you telling me how to do my job?!**

**MsN: Down, you two! Victor!**

**Sabretooth cracks his knuckles**


End file.
